The Search

We get strong messages directing us as to what we are supposed to do with out lives, where we are supposed to go, what we need to focus on for our blossoming. This is between us and our higher selves, or some would say between God and the individual. The extraordinary message is given uniquely for our personal understanding, and may not even be understood by others. It comes to us as a knowing, as a fulfillment of a craving from our soul. I cite the words of the Prophet in the Matrix, “This is just for you, Neo.”

Often, instead of solemnly responding to this call, this direction, we move laterally, i.e., we go to our friends and say “what do you think of this?” In that moment, we have disregarded the deep connection that just occurred. Our friends may be absolutely clueless as to the profound meaning of this direction and all the ramifications it may have in our individual life. Yet, we go to them as though we’re sharing a joke with a punchline that anybody can get. And it is somewhat laughable, while, at the same time, being egregiously tragic.

We’ll call her Janet: Janet brainstormed, prayed, and meditated to know which direction she should move into. She felt she had a choice of three good ways in which to move. One had to do with her family, another with her work, and another had to do with her hobby, i.e., a love for fashion design. She saw these three as separate directions, each one fulfilling an aspect of herself, but each at odds with the others. It finally came to her, a fourth choice that included the fulfillment of all aspects of herself. It was a brilliant suggestion that seemed to transcend all of the limited visions she had come up with. Instead of basking in the appreciation for this yearned-for answer, she treated it like it was tossed out to her from a passing friend in the grocery store. She discussed it casually with everyone she knew until the brilliant essence was watered down to a tasteless dribble of overcooked noodles. Then she resumed the routine search for an answer.

This is not a rare occurrence, in fact, I think we’ve all been here at one time or another. We’re all guilty of this until we reach a level of severity that pushes us to really want to know, to be serious, to really treasure the answer. It is our state of mind that creates the dynamic in which we revisit a book, a poem, or a quote over and over, and each time we find in it something different, something deeper, finally something with great meaning to us. This tiered level of understanding and interpretation springs from our framework, our ever-growing mind and imagination, and our deepening heart.